I took a bit of a step back and thought about my focus after the Southside Six, and made a few decisions and solidified a few things. Then, I got to work. Well, I tried - I started to go back to the gym for early o'clock sessions, and though I'm not back to the level I was a couple of years ago, I'm getting there slowly. I also hesitantly tried to run on the treadmill again, which I used to fit in quite a lot for shorter interval and speed sessions a couple of years back, and want to do again. Then at the weekend, I ran/walked a terrible parkrun on Saturday and felt rubbish but also optimistic. Then on Sunday afternoon in the cold winter's sun, I ran with a friend along the canal path for 4½ slow miles - only 0.25 miles of which were walked, in the middle. I was really pleased with that run, but it just reiterates that my issues with running are led entirely with my head. Were I on my own, that run would have been a different story. I'm not back feeling comfortable with myself as a person yet, so still really struggling to treat myself properly. But I'm making progress; it's been a pretty reasonable week or so. :)

Today I'm feeling a little bit thwarted - I had planned to go to the gym before work, but it didn't happen (lots on at work at the moment, and my attention span is also a bit random) so I grabbed my kit and decided to get a lunchtime run instead. Only, it turns out I forgot my sports bra. *facepalm* Back to the drawing board... :) I'm doing okay, though - slowly but surely getting myself back on track. Next week, my personal trainer returns from holiday, so we'll have a proper chat and make some plans. Or Plans, even.... plans sound waaay better when they have a capital letter. ;)

Food wise, the last 9 days have been a fresh focus on what I'm eating, and while I've not been angelic, I've been a lot better than I've been over the last few months, and managed to lose 4lbs. Just got to try and make sure to keep this going. It's wearing me down, a bit, having to plan and prepare my meals in advance just to avoid making wrong decisions when I'm tired or stressed, but the more I make myself do it, the more I can make it habit, which is key. I made an incredibly tasty cottage pie last week, with loads of veg in with the extra-lean minced beef, and loads of comforting mashed potato, and it lasted me 3 meals, and kept me full up for ages - it's brought home to me that I shouldn't be scared to make big meals, just becase I live on my own. I can always portion it off, and make it last. I'm thinking that on Sunday, I might try roasting a chicken for the first time in my life. (I'm 36, lol.) I'm excited at the thought of how many tasty, healthy meals I can get out of that. (Admittedly, I will fight with myself for hours over whether to throw out the skin, lmao, because it's the tastiest, but fattiest, bit! haha.) And last night, I got out a couple of my old cookbooks for inspiration. I haven't cooked properly for so long, the possibilities are endless! x