Goodbye August. Hello September!

So! It’s September, and I’m hoping to get my life (and blog) back on an even keel. I’ve been working a lot, but letting my health and fitness slide – although that’s not to say I’ve not done any exercise!! I’ve had some pretty great sessions, but just not as regularly as I should have done, and I’ve not been in the gym once. Last week, while working in Perth, I took the chance when the workday was finished to get a run done, partly because it was the only time I’d be able to, but partly because the prospect of the commute home at 5pm wasn’t a promising one. This way, I’d be driving home a bit later, and miss the worst of the traffic. I don’t know Perth very well, but I was recommended to run a section of the old “Heaven and Hell half marathon” route, a race that, until recently, the Perth Road Runners put on every year. It’s well named – 2 long steep climbs, and 2 long descents, I guess which is heaven and which is hell depends on your outlook as a runner!! :-) For my training, I parked at the bottom of one of the big hills, the one which would normally be about 7.5 miles into the race, and goes up for 2 miles. On the Monday, I ran and walked uphill for 1km, then turned round and ran as fast as I could back to my car, before repeating the same. I was absolutely shattered after only 4km, but it felt like it had been a great workout for me, and I also clocked my fastest ever km on the second descent! The next day, Tuesday, I returned, and this time I briskly walked non-stop to the summit (2 miles), before turning and running back to the car. 4 miles, and again, I was exhausted. It doesn’t massively bode well for my 10 mile race in less than 4 weeks, as part of a team in the Clyde Stride relay – but I felt they had been two good sessions regardless.

On the whole, though, I’ve not done a lot of exercise. Robert raised the question in a comment on my last post that perhaps I was putting others’ needs in front of my own – it’s a valid point. My 30 day running challenge ‘ended’ on day 26, because I found it difficult to fit day 27’s run in while I was spending the whole day crewing for Devil o’ the Highlands, and although it upset mea little at the time, the very next day I went out and ran for 30 minutes, which I was thrilled about. I had a busy work week from then, so my next proper run was the next weekend, and I decided I would try and run 5km without walking – which I did in about 38:45, but when I hit the 5km mark, I decided to keep going to round it up to 40 minutes. Problem was, I got a bit distracted by something and when I looked at my watch it said 40:16, so I had to keep running, to round it up to the next full minute (hence 41) – I couldn’t keep running at that point, and slowed to a walk, feeling my legs immediately going a bit jelly-like when I did! I walked for a few minutes, then ran for a short bit, then ran/walked until I’d done a total of 7.5km in 54 mins. It was the most I’d done in a long time, and I felt pretty good for it. I feel now a little sad that I didn’t properly capitalise on it, however like I say, August was just too busy for me. I’ll make sure September is better!! *nods*

In the vein of not letting crewing sideline my own training, the fact that this coming weekend I’ll be crewing James Stewart at Glenmore 24 (a 24 hour race) is not going to stop me from getting a couple of longer training runs done. I’ve taken the Friday, Monday and Tuesday off work, and will be using the Friday and Tuesday to get some good training done – and maybe even a short run before breakfast on Monday, in Aviemore, if I can. I’m very conscious that I need to get some recce runs done on the Clyde Stride route, the race is approaching far too quickly now. It’s frustrating that I’m nowhere NEAR where I wanted to be with my running, when I originally signed up, but I can’t beat myself up for how this year has gone, and where my headspace has been – I just have to do the very best I can, and that’s all I can ask. No recriminations. I’ve been making some good progress with the head-stuff lately, but as with most things, one or two lapses here and there. This weekend just gone, I went along to Glasgow to run at Tollcross parkrun – I’ll not make excuses here, but I put a little bit too much pressure on myself, and the run didn’t go to plan at all. In fact, it included a petulant strop, and I actually STOPPED twice, not just stopped to walk, actually STOPPED, bent over, swore, and wanted to just call it a day. In a 5km. *shakes head* - I was letting the wee voice inside have a field day, and sadly once I was in the headspace it felt like that wee nasty voice was being backed up by the lovely ladies who were running with me at the time – Julie was trying to convince me to run further without walking, and the parkrun tailrunner was trying to reassure me, and all I could hear was the voice in my head shouting “lol, loser, this is turning into your worst ever run, why are you even bothering?” – it’s a question others have asked, and it’s a question I ask myself. I am bothering because I WANT to prove that voice inside me wrong. It was right, though, about one thing: on my 70th parkrun, I recorded the 70th fastest time. Sigh. Anyway, I’m picking out one negative experience from the month when really I should be focussing on the positives!! I’m moving forward with that, and working hard to try and change the way I talk to myself, and hopefully things will continue to progress in that area.

I needed to be in work early today, so my planned return to the gym didn’t happen – however my GENERAL plan for the next 6 months is to get into a routine (albeit with flexibility when needed) which incorporates around 2 gym visits and 3 runs a week, plus a swim. Some of the runs will be indoors as winter moves in; I was horribly reminded about how unsafe my neighbourhood is in the dark this weekend, reading the report of a brutal sex attack on a young woman in the early hours of the morning, close to my flat and less than 5 minutes away from where I would have passed had I given up waiting for a taxi home from town at around 1am on Sunday and walked home. Thankfully, I waited for the taxi – that could have been the smartest decision I’ve made in a very, very long time. It puts my likelihood of doing morning runs outdoors over winter to 28.5%. Maybe higher if I have a day off work…! ;-) But that doesn’t really bother me – I don’t mind treadmill training, and really, it’s all about getting some fitness, dropping weight, and building some structure into my journey to being healthy, so whatever I need to do, I’ll give it a go. A bit of determination and focus, and I'll get there.